it gets better...

(more here and here.)

I started to write this post one week ago, and I'm glad that I never got around to finishing it. What I had written was basically a comparison of my first-week experience from Benjamin with one week of Madeline... and it was pretty depressing. I don't remember much from the first time around, which is probably why I decided to have another baby, but somehow I expected things to be so easy with #2. I couldn't ask for an easier baby than Madeline, but even easy babies need to eat every 3 hours (that means, with feeding and burping and changing and cuddling you're lucky to get an hour and a half of sleep between feedings...) and no matter how good your baby is, your body is still undergoing huge hormonal changes. So I've decided to ditch my frustration-filled downer post and focus instead on how good I feel now.

Because really, I feel pretty good. After the first few days at home I've been able to move freely with minimal abdominal pain, my body is starting to adapt to a broken (and somewhat non-existent) sleep pattern, and I don't *quite* feel as brain-dead as I did with Benjamin. Those are huge improvements from a week ago!

I think the biggest difference in my experiences this time around has been an ability to acknowledge that I'm in a stage of transition right now. When I'm feeling exhausted, overwhelmed, frustrated, or even blue for no reason at all, I'm able to recognize that my body is adjusting, my little guy is trying to figure out his new place in the family, and it definitely won't be this way forever. I'm anxious for Madeline to grow and start sleeping for longer stretches, but I'm trying to remind myself that she'll be hitting the one-month marker before I've blinked. Or the one-year. Or fast approaching on 18 months. Yeesh.

The other big difference this time has been an abundance of love from our church family and friends. My "moms" group at church has been bringing us dinner every other night, and many of my friends have stopped in for the day (or flown in for a few!) just to spend time with us. It's strange to say that Corey's current job predicament is a blessing of sorts, but even having him home with me has done huge things for my morale. We've been able to take both kids out a few times, and my life is starting to feel normal again.

Now, if I could just focus enough to get back into the swing of my homework...